


If Truth is True North

by WhirlyBird70



Series: let the endless dream guide your restless spirit [3]
Category: One Piece
Genre: Gen, Graphic Description, Hurt/Comfort, I guess? I want to be sure, In a way, Nami navigates Luffy's emotions and hers in a really roundabout metaphor, Panic Attacks, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Tumblr Prompt, post battle wounds
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-07
Updated: 2019-11-07
Packaged: 2021-01-24 15:54:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,323
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21340816
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WhirlyBird70/pseuds/WhirlyBird70
Summary: Nami is the best navigator in the world - but the tides of emotions are one thing she has never quite been able to map so well.But - with Luffy she thinks she would rather die then fail in her task to help her captain.(He has given her a place - navigator - so she must fulfill it.)Or:Nami helps Luffy work through some stuff after a battle - a true navigator must be able to chart all seas after all, even ones of the mind.For GreySkyFlower's ask: "I was also wondering if you could possibly continue this or do a one shot where one of the crew gets hurt? You spoke of Nami loving her role as navigator given by Luffy. How would they react if Luffy got seriously hurt? "
Relationships: Monkey D. Luffy & Nami
Series: let the endless dream guide your restless spirit [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1605946
Comments: 11
Kudos: 161





	If Truth is True North

**Author's Note:**

> Title is from "South" by Sleeping at Last

Nami navigates. It’s what she does. She looks at the sky the wind the stars and tells her captain _that way, _and so they go.

She’s drawn maps since she was tiny, loves the smell of parchment and ink and the awe-inspiring feeling of _I’ve seen all that_ when she looks at a finished chart, but nothing will ever quite beat the act of guiding her crew through their grand adventure.

She’s able to stand through hurricanes, tornadoes, water spouts, voyages ten thousand meters to the sky and below the waves. There is nothing she cannot conquer with a log pose or compass, nothing she cannot challenge with the knowledge of the winds and her crew at her back.

All perhaps one thing that is.

Nami’s never been able to deal with emotions well before.

Her childhood has been filled trauma – ever since Bell-mere died, she had no choice but to board up her emotions behind a large brick wall backed with sea stone and anger, because Arlong would have torn her part before then if she hadn’t.

(_Map-maker_, the slimy beast called her, cackling as she staunched the blood dripping from a bullet wound, _your mine. Go make me some maps, won’t you?)_

She’s been a screen of anger and conniving grins since then, snarling at men who touch a little to close and biting at anyone who tries to steal what is _hers (her family’s ticket to freedom.)_ A carefully placed grin – and everyone thinks she on their side.

Then Luffy came in – and suddenly Nami was laughing, crying, shouting with emotions of _sincerity. _Suddenly Nami had a knife in her shoulder and a hat on her head, and friend (_A Captain, a King) _who would do _anything _for her.

Suddenly, Nami had to deal with emotions again.

(_Navigator, my navigator, _Luffy would call her, the words not like a chain but like a crown, like belonging to something _loving_ once more. Never possessing, because as selfish as her Captain was he would always make sure they were _free,_ but always _his._ (Because he’s selfish like that.))

The raging waters of her own heart were something she never thought she had to cross again, but she learned. Learned with the compass of her nakama’s laughter and love, and now…

Nami thinks she’s able to do well enough with herself.

But Luffy – her _compass_, or at least true north – has not.

He bottles it up in a bottle of optimism with a cork of smiles, and hides it behind a scarred chest. He _hurts_, and Luffy can’t lie but he can pretend nothing is wrong, but sometimes he doesn’t even do that (doesn’t he understand his fake smiles hurt more than daggers? Nami would know-) and instead looks so _lost-_

And his navigator has no chart to lead him by.

(But she hasn’t ever needed one before.)

-

Luffy has five bloody bullet wounds in one arm, twelve in the rest of his body and a collar around his neck – sea stone and near unbreakable. His chest is nearly caved in by a stray cannon ball, and it’s a miracle he’s still breathing despite the wounds scattered across his body, pale and unmoving.

It’s the worse Nami’s ever seen Luffy.

(She wonder’s if he was worse after Marineford, then dismisses the thought because of _course_ he was.

Ace is dead after all.)

Nami’s hands are the only ones steady and small enough to help Chopper pick the lock around Luffy’s neck, and so she’s the only one allowed in the infirmary, only one besides Chopper allowed to see every little wound and every little pained gasp Luffy makes.

It makes her break a little inside.

Four hours later however, it’s over, and Luffy by some twist of fate is alive before her, _breathing_, as her bloody hands grip her pants.

Chopper tells Nami to wash up as he goes to bring everyone else in. Nami barely hears him, but she does register Zoro sitting beside her, ever the loyal first mate.

He has a straw hat gripped in his hands, but one look at her face, and Zoro plops it on her head.

She doesn’t question it – if Zoro does it, it means Luffy would have wanted it as well.

(She still wishes Luffy was awake to give it to her himself.)

-

Nami takes the third watch over Luffy. Chopper took the first and Zoro the second while Nami rested, but she doesn’t think she can rest anymore.

(The owner of the strawhat tied around her neck isn’t awake to claim it after all.)

It’s a day after the battle at this point, ship safely away from the Marine filled island, and captain sleeping away the battle fever (and _torture)_ in the belly of their ship of dreams. There’s a pile of food beside the bed – Chopper says despite the wounds, Luffy should wake up sometime soon, so Sanji has been busy. Nami herself has a plate of sandwiches in front of her to snack on, and a few oranges to the side.

(One’s for Luffy when he wakes up – but only one. Nami can’t let her captain be spoiled after all.)

She is making notes about the log pose when she hears it – a soft rustling from the bed and a low, pained groan, in a familiar voice.

“Luffy!” Nami turns around, uncaring about the ink spilling about in her haste to see her captain.

But Luffy doesn’t see her despite the fact that his eyes are wide open. His eyes are glassy and hazy as he tries to sit up in bed, but his arm shake beneath him (7 total bullets had torn into his arms, regular but able to hurt due to the sea stone collar wrapped around her Captain’s neck (who only ever wanted to be _free-)) _and he collapses backward.

Nami opens her mouth to call out for her captain again but the words lodge in her throat as Luffy’s hand impossible drifts to his chest, where bandages cover up the scar.

He seems to panic at that, fingers gripping into the place where his scar _should _be, instead feeling only cloth keeping his chest together.

A scratchy sound, barely even a voice, whispers from his throat. “_Ace…_”

Nami stops cold in her tracks, feet as stuck as her voice.

_Oh no – oh please no-_

“Ace?” Luffy’s voice is still hoarse, but louder and more frantic. “Ace? Ace! Ace I’m here – where are you – where’s Ace?” He coughs, but that only makes him look down at his hands, which seems to trigger something even more horrific in his mind.

“No – No no nononono! ACE!” He tears at his hands, and that’s when Nami knows she can’t stay still anymore.

She dashes over, grappling at his hands to prevent him from pulling against the bullet wounds, to prevent them from tearing at himself, at his chest.

(His hands are calloused where they grip hers, only slightly bigger, but seemingly smaller with how fragile he feels right now.)

“Luffy,” She calls, voice firm and gentle as she sits beside him. There’s no tremor in her voice to betray the panic welling up inside her. “_Luffy. Breathe.”_

He doesn’t – instead his breaths get even shorter as he struggles to voice his desperate calls for his brother and his hands struggle further to get to his chest, to do what Nami doesn’t know but she doesn’t want to find out.

_“_Ace, Ace, Ace, Ace where are you_ ACE-“ _

_“Luffy!” _She regrets shouting as soon as she says it but at least Luffy’s words have stopped. “Breath. You’re on the Sunny, you’re in the infirmary. You’re safe, Luffy, you’re safe, we wont ever let something like that happen to you again, please, Luffy – “ She takes a breath and gathers her own composure.

_She can’t help Luffy if she can’t help herself._

“Luffy,” Nami lifts Luffy up so he’s rest against her, able to feel her chest go in and out in big exaggerated movements. “Breath – c’mon, do it with me. In – 2, 3 – Out, 2 3. That’s it Luffy.”

And ever so slowly, Luffy’s hands stop gripping at his chest, stop pulling at his wounds. Ever so slowly, Nami helps Luffy navigate his way back _home,_ back to himself.

Ever so slowly, Luffy comes back, until he gazes around with a confused look. “Na-Nami?”

“Yeah, Luffy,” she swallows back her sigh of relief. “It’s me. You back with me captain?”

It’s a long silence before he responds. But Nami’s patient, She allows Luffy to play with her hand in his, allows him to affirm that _yes,_ she’s _real _and _no, _he _isn’t_ back _there. _It’s a slow process, but

_“_I think so?”

_It’s worth it._

_-_

Nami doesn’t talk to him about it the day of, or even the week after. Instead, she ambushes him on his first day allowed back on deck without supervision (medical supervision that is – Luffy’s a devil fruit eater with a penchant for trouble. Its good to make sure there’s someone there to shout “Man Overboard!” at all times.)

Most of the bandages are off at this point – rubber is wonderfull for healing stuff, and the future world’s best doctor does greatly help matters – all save for the swathe of bandages around his chest.

“Hey Nami,” Luffy greets first. “Wanna sit?” He pats the place next to him on Sunny’s head.

“Of course, Captain.” Luffy laughs as she stumbles on her way up, but scoots closer as she settles down.

Looking out at the sea, Nami understands why Luffy loves this spot. The light of the sun over the ways now, at dusk, makes the world seem like a fire of molten gold.

It’s _beautiful._

But nothing gold can say, as that old book goes, and their silence is broken.

“Don’t scare us like that, okay Luffy?”

“Mmhmm.” He only hums in response, so Nami takes that as the okay to breach the territory they haven’t ever dared venture.

“Luffy… when you woke up for the first time, do you remember that?”

“Yeah…” His voice is suddenly ten times quieter, and the waves seem almost overwhelming in comparison.

“Were you thinking about Marineford?”

“… Yeah.”

“Mmhmm.” Its Nami’s turn to hum now, letting Luffy set the pace, letting Luffy stop the conversation if he wants.

(This is new territory, things yet to be charted. One misstep and her captain could be hurt, but Nami’s been mapmaking since she was born, she can do this, help her captain figure it all out.)

“Do you wake up like that a lot?”

“…Sometimes..” Nami doesn’t expect Luffy to speak much after that, and is surprised when he goes on. This time, his legs are hugged up to his chest, face resting on his knees as he looks out to see. Its almost as if he’s forcing himself not to touch his scar. “When I got out of Marineford, I was on Torao’s ship, all bandaged up. I didn’t know what was going on only that – that Ace wasn’t there and my chest hurt and felt too tight and there was pain _everywhere and –_“

“Luffy – Breathe.”

Luffy takes a deep breath, one that would be comical if the situation weren’t so serious, and continues. “And it hurt. And- And now sometimes I get reminded, and I don’t like it, and it feels like I’m back at Impel Down, and – and – and-” He gives up on trying to get the words out and buries his face in his knees, so uncharacteristically meek it _hurts._

(It reminds Nami of herself, trapped in the map room at Arlong Park, terrfified that she was going to be crushed under the weight of the world.)

“Luffy – it’s okay. You’re not there anymore, okay?”

_“BUT IT DOESN’T FEEL LIKE THAT!” _Luffy shouts, then rushes to hide his head again. He doesn’t like to shout at his crew in anything but joy, not since Water 7.

“And _we will help you Luffy- _ You just have to let _us. _We can help make those feeling stop, okay? Okay?”

“But – I’m the captain, and –“

“Luffy. No. Look at me okay?” He looks at her, and Nami knows what she will say next won’t be enough, because Luffy doesn’t believe in words without actions, but it will be a start so they _can_ help. “You don’t know how to navigate. You don’t know how to cook anything but barbecue meat, or swordfight, or snipe, or play the violin or build a ship or heal wounds or read poneglyphs. That’s why you have us, okay? And we’re here to _help, _Captain, help you reach the top and we won’t think any less of you if you need _help._ Let us help you Luffy, we want to – we can all see how you’re hurting.”

His face goes through an odd sort of emotion, but Nami can see what he wants. It’s good as yes anyway.

So she spreads open her arms, and her captain squeezes the life out of her.

(She doesn’t mention how her shoulder is wet.)

It’s different, Nami thinks, leading her captain back to the infirmary, already talking about ways to make all the pain ease up - (_Making sure the bandages aren’t pressing, pain medication to ease pain in the chest and telling him where he Is when he wakes up – things to make him stop thinking of the aftermath of Marineford, just as they let Nami have her own cache of belli stored away, just as they give Robin a cup of warm tea after a fire on an island. Ways to fend off nightmares – Zoro wouldn’t mind another bedmate, moron that he is, and Usopp stays up late anyway.) – _navigating for this captain. His waters are treacherous and his winds stormy, but behind all that is a steady smile of sunshine.

But if she’s able to guide him through it, maybe, just maybe, she can help her captain find himself again.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! So I hope you all liked this piece! I changed up the oringinal ask a bit, but it was something I've been wanting to write for awhile so I just went with it! Sorry for the delay, I keep on trying to make short stuff but it never quite manages to stay under 1000 words lol.
> 
> This is my first time really writing Nami and Luffy, but I'm not sure if I completely nailed down their characterization, so any suggestions are welcome!
> 
> This is rushed posting, but I just came back from my birthday dinner and I am exhausted, so please tell me if there are any mistakes! I didn't look that closely lol.
> 
> Thank you for reading!
> 
> \- Whirly
> 
> [My Tumblr](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/whirlybirdwhat) if you wanna yell at me!


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